29 May 2006

What happened to continuity.

I've been watching some things, and some movies, and I wonder.. all those scenes that the movies skip, are like movies within themselves.

For example, Underworld: Evolution. That scene in the end where they're on the island.. how do they get back? I'm more interested in that. Who cares about slaying the vampire, that's just... the usual cutting. I wanna know how they get off that island. No GPS, the helicopter is destroyed..etc. Certainly no cell/sat phones.

In fact, that movie might be longer and more intricate than Harold and Kumar. Exciting! Would they

1) construct a sat phone from scratch?
2) put their vampire skills together and fly out of there?
3) moan like savages until someone hears them?
4) burn the entire island so some survey plane can see?

Those are interesting things. Like Jurassic Park III was all about getting off the island, except there were dinosaurs.

Speaking of dinosaurs, it's really mean to say this, but there are some girls that look like dinosaurs. For example:

[Warning. The rest of this post is mean. If you're overweight and/or look like a dinosaur, don't read this. That being said, most girls can be equated to some kind of dinosaur. Yes. That's a bad thing. No, not my fault.]

Now imagine if that thing didn't have wings. There you have it! There are girls that look like pterodactyls without wings. It's pretty scary. Sometimes I'm forced to sit next to them in class. Oh man. It's like some wild party in my head. One guy's saying "SHE MIGHT BITE YOU", and two others are like ROFL, and the last one is like "stop it, that's mean".

It's hard to control the laughter when that happens. All kinds of variants exist. Such as triceratops without horns (although, if you factor the personality, the horns probably wouldn't hurt as much as their caustic manner). Speaking of triceratops, you know what I think of when I think triceratops? That huge pile of dung in Jurassic Park. Again, the laughter is difficult to control, when these creatures lounge about.

All the triceratops and dinosaurs and coelocanths (?) and etc and etc get together and call each other pretty. Unfortunately, in the girl universe, having different looks is usually a bad thing. Why am I so bitter? Because she left me for someone worse. Kind of. Damn it.

Being a dinosaur isn't as bad as being a lonely human.

Memorial Day weekend is over, and I'm set for class tomorrow. Philosophy and Japanese start this Thursday. Exciting!

1 comment:

rob said...

OH NOES